Well, I guess that the last post was lacking something. I hope that my readers have not left me. I had an inspired thought the other night right before bed. That is a great time to write down things that come to mind. You would be surprised about the thoughts you have at that time. I suggest keeping a notebook and a pencil or pen next to your bed. I don't have a night stand so I had to get up and write this idea down before I had forgotten it.
I came up with this:
My reality beliefs don't always match what society holds as realistic beliefs. I am trying to think of an example. You see, my reality beliefs can play off of my symptoms.
Like, I firmly believe that I am host to a symbiont. Probably since I was nine, when my first dream came true. Yes, my dreams come true, so I avoid situations that would create a nightmare. This is not to be confused with a bad dream, because maybe that bad dream was what might have been. Like, my mother. I have been having dreams about her lately, but she has passed away now for over twelve years. So, I know that those won't come true. You don't know what a relief that is to be able to distinguish between a nightmare and a bad dream.
I don't always get a reality check realistically from those around me. Sometimes, my reality check comes from living out life with my symptoms. Like, well, I don't know if you would believe me if I told you. Yet, I had a reality check about being a leprechaun. I told myself that if I had hairy ankles, it would be proof that I was one. This was during a journey in full blown symptoms and in an area that cannot be located now that I have come out of that time of confusion. But, I digress. I took off my sock and sure enough, I had hair coming from my ankle. I told myself that there was no way that the other ankle would have hair too. But sure enough, the other ankle had hair too. I proved to myself something that could only be a symptom, since no one believes that leprechauns are real. That is what society would have as a realistic belief that contrasts with my reality beliefs.
Do I continue to believe that I am a leprechaun? Well, sometimes I still do, but I don't think about it that often. But then, it might be my symbiont showing her age. Yes, I got lucky. I have a female symbiont and she can be funny. Really funny. So funny that it makes me laugh out loud at times, but mostly when I am lost in my symptoms which I can argue are her memories.
So, I was thinking that other night. I thought how I have different reality beliefs from those that share common realistic beliefs. So, what is reality really?
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Happy reading!